babble
Thursday, March 13, 2003
I got a whole bunch of new crap in the last few days, even though I am totally short on cash because I am putting all of my spare cash towards paying off the stupid fucking credit card debt that I ran up while I was unemployed last year. I was supposed to stop charging new crap on my credit cards and only buy things with cash, and then I was going to pay my evil credit card overlords whatever cash I had left over so as to reduce my balances in a reasonably quick manner. However, I apparently cannot resist the siren call of new technology and/or repairs to large appliances in my home, so I have spent a whole mess of plastic money in the last few days. I know you are just fucking dying to know what I bought with all my ill-gotten credit, so I will tell you all about it, you nosy fucking bastards.
One of the things I spent money on was actually a necessity. Shocking, I know, but it had to be done. A few days ago, our refrigerator started to act like a stupid fucking bitch and decided it didn't need to keep things cold enough. I mean, melted Fudgesicles are okay and all, but only if it's a hot summer day and you have to eat it before it melts all over your girlfriend's boobs... um, anyway, we decided that having milk spoil after a day was not cost-effective, so we had to call a repairman and get him to come out and fix that dirty whore of a refrigerator. It turns out that our frost-free refrigerator decided she didn't want to be free of frost anymore, and chaos had ensued. The repairman fixed her up and melted a bunch of frost onto our floor, and we sent him on his way with our pockets much lighter but our Fudgesicles much colder.
Now, as some of you may know, I am a photography nut. You wouldn't know it if you just looked at this website, but contrary to popular belief I do exist in the physical realm and some people have actually seen me in person and know that I have a camera somewhere on my person most of the time. Anyway, because I am a cheap bastard and also would like to start developing and scanning my own film instead of paying a lab $20 a pop, I bought a scanner. It's brand spanking new and people are lusting after it like crazy, and I have it, and that makes me happy because I usually get technology when it's been around for quite a while due to my cheap bastard-ness. I figure this puppy will pay for itself in about 25 rolls of film (because I have to buy darkroom stuff, too, for all you math nerds who think I'm estimating incorrectly). At least that's how I justified it to myself.
I also bought a wireless router for my house, which means that now I can surf the intarweb while I'm in bed, on the couch, or on the shitter. I am sure that those scenarios cover 99% of the fetishes of my illustrious readership, but if you have a specific idea in your head about what I should be doing whilst wirelessly surfing for porn, please let me know.
So now, I'm nearly broke, sitting on my toilet scanning slides of my girlfriend covered in melted Fudgesicles and wirelessly blogging the whole thing. So what do you think I'm going to do next? What everyone would do, of course - I'm going to an all-nude strip club for lunch with my boss and four other friends. Wouldn't you do the same? Of course you would.
babbled by Kat @ 10:59:00 AM |
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