babble
Saturday, October 18, 2003
Unfair:
Last night I had a fabulous time at the Novel Cafe and the somethingsomething Irish pub in Santa Monica with some people from NaNoWriMo. Yes, it's that time of year again, and I'll be bugging all of my writer friends to join up shortly. I've just been a bit too preoccupied to harass you yet, but never fear, I'll be doing it soon and often.
Today I had to go run around all over the goddamn place getting things ready for my trip. I was all proud of myself, because even though I was up until 3 a.m. last night totally losing it (which I'll explain in a moment), I woke up on time and got out the door on schedule to run my myriad errands.
However, I forgot the checks I was going to deposit.
I didn't realize that until I got all the way to Pasafuckingdena.
So, with the bank closing in an hour and the round-trip from there to my place a good 45 minutes, I had to make an executive decision and decided to abandon the banking and just execute the rest of the plan, so I went to the American Express office to exchange some money. May I just mention that Euros are pretty funny-looking? I haven't been back to Europe in a few years, and so I'd never seen them in person before. They have this weird silvery strip thing on them. Anyway, I'll be spending them in Ireland in a few days, so what the fuck do I care?
After running the rest of my errands, which included a stop at Mold Gravy and stocking up on film at Freestyle, I came home and surveyed my kingdom, and all was well with the world.
Well, not really.
See, the reason why I was up late last night was because my friend Jeff passed away. I got the e-mail from his brother yesterday afternoon, and for some reason the reality just didn't fucking hit me until I got home. I'm worried about all of my friends who are affected by this. I'm angry because he was only 21 and he was one of the nicest people I've ever met, and it's just not fucking fair that he was taken when he was so young. And I'm sad because he and I hadn't talked that much lately, and that's exactly how it was with my friend Libra when she died - I kept meaning to spend time with her, and then bam, she was gone.
Yesterday, I didn't know how to deal with it. At first it was some form of denial, I guess. I checked the Forest Lawn site to see if his service was listed.. to see if it was really real, I guess, and I saw his name there. I guess a part of me knew it was real, but I don't know if I just didn't fully acknowledge it, or if I was just dealing with it by being around my friends for some kind of comfort, or what. But when I got home and talked to my friend Wes, and saw what he and Jeff's other friends had written about him in their journals, I just broke down and wept.
I don't know what else to say. So many people were touched by this wonderful person's life, and we'll all miss him.
babbled by Kat @ 7:14:00 PM |
|
