babble
Monday, January 26, 2004
I ran the risk of blowing up:
Hi, I'm a dyed monkey.
Normally when Kat has guest bloggers they are baby animals, but this time she invited me, a grown-up animal, mainly because I think she felt bad for me and my monkey friends here because someone dyed our fur funky colors. I'm the one with the dark fur. As you can tell from their expressions, my monkey friends here are either too sad, dumbfounded, or pissed by their new fur colors to write anything in some stupid fucking blog on the intarweb, so I'm left to do all the reporting on Kat's pathetic excuse for a life.
Actually, she had quite a productive weekend, considering the state she was in most of last week. On Saturday she ran some errands, which included buying art supplies so she can paint horribly amateurish self-portraits and body jewelry to put in some piercings that you'll probably never get to see even if you know her in real life. In keeping with this theme of actually leaving the house, she went to her favorite gallery for their latest opening and spent some time trying not to drool on the awesome paintings. Then she went to the bar and had a spirited discussion with one of her neighbors about subjects ranging from politics to religion to porn. (Of course, it was mostly about porn, but every once in a while they managed to drag their minds out of the gutter, if only for a minute or two.)
On Sunday, Kat woke up feeling all energized for some unknown reason (wink wink) and decided to get a lot of shit done. Part of her new Sunday ritual involves going to her neighbor's house and dissecting what passes for her love life while drinking coffee and smoking cloves, then walking to the local convenience store for junk food. While this is probably not the most physically healthy activity one could engage in, it seems to have a positive effect on her mental state, so the only logical conclusion I can reach is that coffee, junk food, and clove cigarettes are good for you. Then again, I'm a fucking monkey with dyed fur, what do I know? Anyway, after Kat & friend finished eating junk food and plotting world domination, she proceeded to go home and get chores done in a flurry of activity the likes of which the world has never seen! Well, not really, but she did a metric asston of laundry, washed dishes, and cleaned her kitchen. But that's not all! She also started some paintings! And deep-conditioned her hair! And inserted jewelry into piercings that you really want to see but never will!
God, I'm exhausted just thinking about all that shit.
In any case, Kat is feeling really happy about how productive she was. She's also feeling much better after her illness and is waiting for confirmation from her doctor as to whether her illness was actually a UTI or just some weird-ass 72 hour flu, because all of a sudden she feels much better and hasn't even taken any antibiotics, so she thinks maybe she might have just come down with a sudden case of diphtheria that just magically cured itself. She'll let you know, of course, because that dumb bitch is just too fucking honest with you people.
I've got to get back to consoling these dumb-looking motherfuckers next to me. I keep trying to tell them their fur color is all the rage with the kids these days but they're not listening. I guess I'll just have to get them drunk on Thunderbird, bust out the clippers and give them all mohawks.
Go visit Jim and offer him sex
babbled by Kat @ 9:22:00 AM |
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